We found out we where pregnant with Jason on Febuary 11th 2007. I cryed tears of joy cause i was so happy to be a Mother it was my dream. We went to the hospital Feb 17th due to heavy bleeding and they told me my due date Oct 20th (which happened to be 50wks) and that i was about 5 or 6 weeks along.We got engaged V-day 2007. i was in and out of the ER for Several months due to heavy Bleeding. i could not see a doctor due to the fact that the state of mississippi had not processed my insurance so no one would see me. In April 2007 we took our first trip to texas to visit my husbands family. i barely remember anything cause i was so sick due to the horrible morning sickness i had with him. i am glad i at least have pictures to remember it by. we had our first mothers day May 2007 (of course i was pregnant but i was so excited about being a mother). On May 24th 2007 i was finally able to go to the doctor. when the doctor came in she tryed to find a heartbeat and she couldn't so she told us to come back the next day for an ultrasound. so May 25th came around and i got their and i was so excited! so we went in for a ultrasound and i didn't know what was gonna happen so i had it done with a smile on my face of excitement! so they sent us to a small waiting area and as i come back from the bathroom and my husband (not at the time) tells me "Paula i think something is wrong the nurses where acting weird and talking about us" so 15 mins later a nurse comes and tells us to wait in the doctors office. So when the doctor came in she told us that we lost the baby (we did not know his gender yet) and we had options.. to either abort the baby, wait till my due date to have him which could cause infection, or we could have a d&c which would make me give birth to him. so we scheduled a D&C for May 30, 2007 (which was almost a week after we found out but it was memorial day weekend and she was on vacation) for noon. So when i got there they gave me cervidal (sp?) to start the contractions. my contractions where VERY mild compared to natural laboring process.
so 3:45pm i got up to go to the bathroom and my water broke and it had blood in it. i didn't anything of it cause i didn't know much about pregnancy and labor then. so when i got back to the bed i laided there and i felt some come out of me (tmi to most lol)... i didn't think anything of it and then 5 mins later i told my husband (not at the time) that i was i think something came out of me and so he looks and then runs off to get the nurse and comes back an the nurse starts trying to figure out what it was by wiping it. So my husband (not at the time) saying "OMG i think that is the baby and he has all this green stuff all over him". So i am emotional and so i start to panic and didn't want to see the baby or hold him. after that the nurse runs off and gets me some meds that make me sleepy.After i gave Birth to him he doctor decides to get a HUGE metal thing and scrap the blood clots out... i was already a emotional mess and the scrapping the VERY uncomfortable.. so i told her to stop and she tried to reason with me and i said no an so she says just one more time and that its.. so after argueing with her a couple of times i finally looked my husband and he said "thats enough" so she leaves and he goes after her and they both agree to put me under to scrap me out. So i passed out for about 2 hrs and i wake up and see who all is there and ask what was the baby and everyone said "ITS A BOY". so i passed out again cause of the meds they gave me and my sister and her bf came... i barely remember seeing them and i said no she can't see the baby. so i passed out again.. and then wake up an my husband (not at the time) asked me if i wanted to hold the baby and i was unsure at first but i did and he was so tiny he weighed 33grams and was 5.25 inches long he was born at 4:10pm. he had two thumbs and he was the estimated weight of 15wks gestation (when i was estimated 25wks along). So by then the transporters came to get me from surgery and they where just rude... tried to lay a blanket on top my son (which was in the baby incubator) and started talking about babies in a mean way. so my husband followed them to the surgery room they wouldn't let him in so he went back to the room. i remember while sitting in the room that looked like a triage room and seeing the doctor and about 10 nurses stand around me asking questions.. i dunno if it was real or not but sure did seem that way. So i got done with surgery and they sent me back to the room... i was still a bit sleepy.my husband had filed a complaint against the two transporters and the head nurse over L&D and someone from corparate of the hospital came to talk to us and said they would handle it.When i got back they had taken Jason to the funeral home... they gave us two options to either find out what happened to him or put him to rest. I had to stay in the hospital for two days family and friends came by to visit me and brought me flowers.i was discharged from the hospital the day before my brothers wedding... i was unsure of how i would feel getting around other people.... so my husband (not at the time) rented me a wheelchair cause i was suppose to be off my feet. we wind up just being able to make it to the reception. people would see me in a wheelchair and look at me weird...like awe there is something wrong with her... which there was i had just lost my child... but no one had known that... twos weeks after having Jason we buried him next to his great grandmother who died Jan 2007 (and his great grandfather joined them August 2007) on June 6th (which my favorite grandmother died that same day in 1994). he was a small funeral we had just a few family members... he was buried with a small blanket that had that had angel wings on it. he didn't have a casket it was small box. i didn't cry...i had cryed enough already. during that second week... one day i went to lay down on the bed and felt something come out of me and i look an i freak so tell my husband (not at the time) to come see and he runs to call the ambulance cause he didn't know what it was and so he calls my parents and my dad runs up the driveway an so my husband (not at the time) goes to talk to him .........get to the hospital and they say its blood clot... phew everything is fine... so 1 and half months later we got married and then 2 and half months later we got pregnant with his baby sister Abagail Rose.
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